


Reaching Out

by Nelioe



Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Not Related, Annoyed Fíli, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fili is so done with everything, Humiliation, Insults, Kili needs a hug, Kili's ex is an arsehole, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Sex Tapes, Sexual Harassment, Tears, implied Kíli/Smaug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-24
Updated: 2016-11-14
Packaged: 2018-08-24 10:20:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,737
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8368615
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nelioe/pseuds/Nelioe
Summary: If it was up to Fili he would've finished college without any socialising. He had to deal with enough shit in his life as it was and didn't need to deal with the problems of other people. Especially not with the cocky brunet that got on his nerves whenever Fili saw him. But then he went quiet. Written for FiKi week.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This story was written for FiKi week.
> 
> Mon, 24 Oct: cliche ~~or~~ **and** original

 

 

There were many things Fili had no energy to deal with during his day. Snippy professors, smart-aleck students trying to disprove his answers in seminars, study groups in which he was the only one having a plan of what they needed to do – was there anything worse than group members complaining about every idea but not contributing anything? – and that loud guy Fili saw at least two times a week. In the library, in the cafeteria, in the hallways, at the bus stop, in the queue of Fili’s favourite coffee shop, he was everywhere and he was annoying.

Just yesterday he’d gotten once again on the blond’s nerves. Cracking jokes, laughing loudly and bragging about whatever was going on in this strange head of his. He had flirted with the girl behind the counter, calling her by her name after a glimpse on the name plate, asking her about her day – Fili needed to get back to his studies and didn’t have the time to wait in the queue for the whole day, for god’s sake! – and for holding up everyone he was rewarded with a coffee for free.

Long hair peeping out under a grey beanie, clothed in skinny jeans and a plain dark shirt, brown eyes matching his hair and the stubbles on his cheeks, this was the form of the biggest irritation he had met at this college so far.

“Why the hell did you get a free coffee again?” one of the brunet’s friends exclaimed.

And the nuisance had the impudence to shrug nonchalantly, gave his mate a cheeky grin and replied cockily: “Well, who else?”

If Fili hadn’t disliked him before this incident, he certainly then would’ve started glaring at that face, whenever he spotted the grey beanie in a crowd. Whoever had said studying was the best time of a young person’s life had no idea what life was like for a person, trying to follow in the footsteps of his uncle. Thorin’s company was a huge business with locations in six other countries. Fili would inherit it one day and he was working hard on making his uncle proud. He had ambitions, but for those only the best degrees were acceptable. Studying was his only purpose in life right now, despite meeting a couple of friends for a pint of beer once a week.

He didn’t need annoying students and loud idiots like this guy, they only caused his concentration to slip and this was something he couldn’t allow himself. So when, during the next week, the blond didn’t have to listen to the loud voice once, he assumed the brunet was staying at home sick and thanked whoever had knocked him out with their germs for the blissful silence. Not that there weren’t other factors annoying his busy schedule, but one distraction less definitely helped to improve his mood.

When the quietness continued, though, Fili began to wonder if the brunet’s absence was perhaps related to something worse than a cold and felt immediately bad for enjoying the current peace. His friends were still sticking to their usual schedule, though and didn’t behave different, so it couldn’t be that bad. It helped to silence Fili's conscience.

Not for very long, however. Three weeks after their last time together in a queue, Fili spotted the brunet in the refectory. He was sitting on an empty table, shoulders hunched, and looked out of the window with tired eyes. Such a gloomy expression felt wrong on such a sunny day, even Fili, always stressed, was in rather good spirits that day, seeing the lack of a smile on features that would usually shine with it, seemed all the more misplaced.

Fili shrugged it off. He didn’t know the guy. Perhaps he simply had a bad day. Still, he couldn’t help but wonder where the brunet’s friends were he usually wasn’t seen without.

After that a few days went by until he saw him again. It didn’t feel like an unusual situation. Fili was outside of the office of his professor for an appointment, because he would let the man know that he’d done all of the work for the group project, while everyone was just clinging to him like a leech, hoping for great marks without even lifting a finger. Right that moment the grey beanie appeared on the empty hallway, heading for a seminar room. The brunet was late, but the campus was big and sometimes the distance the students had to travel, to get from one building to another, wasn’t even covered by the breaks between classes. If the guy hadn’t held his head low, as if attempting to shut out the world, Fili wouldn’t have thought anything about it. Either way, his mind didn’t dwell on the sight for too long, professor Grey asked him in and Fili’s attention was returned to the topic that truly concerned him.

The next day the brunet once again occupied Fili’s favourite coffee shop. He sighed, as soon as he spotted the grey beanie two heads in front of him in the queue. At least he was silently staring at his phone and the group of people he hung out with was nowhere to be seen, so it was at least quiet. Who knew how long he would delay the queue this time, though, just to get his coffee for free. Fili was already considering forgoing his much needed dose of caffeine, when the door to the shop opened and familiar voices reached his ears. Great, the friends had arrived. That was it with the calm of the day. If the brunet let them go first now, Fili would give them a piece of his mind.

To his surprise, he didn’t need to. The brunet looked up, noticed his friends entering and all of a sudden edged out of the queue, heading hurriedly for the side entrance of the shop, as if fleeing from something. Fili frowned. It seemed like he would get his coffee without complications today, but the incident was so weird, he couldn’t really feel happy about it.

On another day Fili was on his way home after a long and exhausting day. He was waiting at the bus stop, avoiding the big groups of students talking, complaining and joking, when he detected the brunet. If he hadn’t waited for the bus a good deal away from the small gatherings, Fili wouldn’t have even recognised him, after all, usually the brunet was a part of this big social circle around the blond. And as much as Fili wanted to tell himself that he didn’t care what was going on with the other guy, he couldn’t help but notice the rumbled clothes, the dark circles around his eyes and the sad expression on his features. He stared at his phone, as if he wanted to appear busy, since not once did his thumb wipe over the screen. Fili might not feel like interacting with other students, most seemed like complete selfish idiots, but in that moment only the arriving bus stopped him from going over and offering that poor sod a hug. The brunet really looked like he needed one.

Fili caught one of the coveted seats and started digging for his headphones – his stop was good twenty minutes away – when a sight at the door of the bus caught his eye. The brunet had just tried to enter the vehicle as well, but another guy pushed him backwards. Fili shook his head softly, idiots like this aggressive dude deserved a kick up the backside. What the hell was wrong with him? The brunet could’ve fallen and hurt himself in who knew what ways.

“What’s your problem?” the brunet’s voice reached his ears for the first time in weeks.

“We don’t need sluts like you in here. You will only get the seats dirty. Ask your next punter to drive you home!”

The brunet stared at the other student in shock, eyes wide and mouth slightly agape. He didn’t try to get into the bus again, just stood in front of the door, completely rigid. The driver waited for about ten seconds and then figured no one wanted to get in anymore. The doors closed and the bus took off.

At first Fili couldn’t do anything but stare at the spot the young man had stood not long ago. What had just happened? This was a college for heaven’s sake! Adults were supposed to study here, instead he felt as if he was taken back to school. This behaviour… Fili didn’t care what the brunet might have done, this was no way to act in public. No one deserved that and even though the blond never really got along with the other students, he’d attested them some common sense. But what he’d just witnessed made him clench his fists with anger and disgust.

That night he slept badly for the first time, the look on the brunet’s face haunting him. He regretted not standing up for him, although the rational part of him knew that he’d been too shocked in that moment to react. Still, he couldn’t shake off that nagging feeling. He should’ve helped the guy. He was the heir of an important company and knew that good work could only be achieved with a good working atmosphere. Things like this mustn’t be tolerated. If he wasn’t able to intervene in a situation like yesterday in the bus, how could he be certain he would do everything in his power to stop it, should it happen under his management?

Then again, he would never have to face such situations if he missed finishing his studies and therefore Fili silenced his raging thoughts, got dressed, had breakfast and left to spent his day in the library. Since it was a very warm day, most students avoided the library in favour of studying outside in the sun, which was alright with the blond, more quietness for him.

The section for books concerning business administration was located in the basement, so it would be nicely cool and the sweat wouldn’t run into his eyes while reading. As nicely as a glass roof might appear, whoever had been responsible for the architecture was an idiot when it came to remembering seasons.

It was silent in the lowest part of the library, the few tables he passed unoccupied and every of his steps echoed through the small hallways created by bookshelves as his gaze followed the identification numbers. Searching for those scribbled on a small piece of paper he was holding, Fili soon found what he’d been looking for and was heading for one of the empty tables, when a sudden sound made him halt.

He frowned and strained his ears. There! There it was again. It almost sounded like sniffling. Confused Fili followed the quiet sound, rounded the corner to the backmost corner of this section and spotted the brunet. He couldn’t say what he had expected to find, but the sight caught him off guard. Not only had he never seen the other student in this area of the library, – Fili was pretty sure the guy studied veterinary medicine and those books were somewhere on the second floor, – he also looked a mess.

The brunet was sitting at the table with hunched shoulders, his hair dishevelled and as if it hadn’t been washed since a little too long. The so loved beanie was lying on the table, next to papers, books and wadded handkerchiefs scattered around. As if the slight tremors, rocking the frail-looking body, weren’t enough evidence of the tears he tried to cry so silently.

Fili could’ve turned around then, pretend he hadn’t seen anything, leave the other to whatever pained him and return to his studies. No one would know. But regardless how fed up he was with college and all of its students, he had watched a usually cocky and loud young man withdraw and go quiet over the last couple of weeks. He wasn’t cruel and he certainly wasn’t going to run like a coward now and if he was honest with himself, Fili was a bit curious and concerned.  So clenching his jaw with determination Fili took a step forward. 

Hearing someone approaching, the brunet wheeled around, staring at him with the same kind of shock that had painted his expression yesterday during the bus incident, instantly causing Fili to feel uncomfortable. The bloodshot eyes and his blotchy face made the formerly handsome features appear almost sickly.

“Wha-,“ the brunet cleared his throat, “what do you want?” It didn’t help to cover the croak in his voice.

“Nothing,” Fili replied honestly, raising his hands in a defensive gesture. “I just wanted to make sure you are alright.”

The brunet’s eyebrows wandered upwards and while he wasn’t looking as impressive as he might have without tear tracks on his cheeks, it certainly didn’t fail its purpose. Fili felt a little stupid, too, when the other student snorted. Someone who was crying was definitely not okay.

“Piss off! I’m not going to blow you or anything!” he hissed, a mixture of sadness and bitterness coating his words.

“What the fuck?” Fili blurted out.

His head, busy with processing the information, stopped working for some time. He wondered if there was something he had missed, if he had sent some mixed signals while approaching the brunet, but came up blank. Shock and a hint of offense crept under his skin.

“I don’t even know you! Why would I want that?” Was he sending out some strange kind of vibes? He walked normally, talked normally, dressed normally… he was probably one of the most boring guys at this university, how the hell could anyone mistake him for one of those sleazy people?

Surprise crossed the other’s features, probably at noticing the scandalised expression adorning Fili’s features. He was searching for the right words to give the other a piece of his mind, when the brunet suddenly beat him to it, opening his mouth almost hesitantly.

“You… you haven’t watched the video?” he wondered quietly.

Fili frowned. “What video?”

At that the other student went quiet again, shirking from meeting his gaze, the brunet lowered his head, staring tensely at the table top. Folding his arms in front of his chest, he looked small and ashamed, his hair falling around his face like a curtain.

“Nothing,” he mumbled defensively.

Every bit of his demeanour seemed to beg Fili to leave, to let him alone with whatever weighed upon him. And perhaps it would be better to follow his wishes, however, the blond was still curious and deeply concerned. What video was he talking about? Fili wasn’t socialising with many students here, so it wasn’t surprising he had no idea of the current circumstances and normally he wouldn’t interfere with someone’s life. This time, though, he had already talked with the brunet, there was no way back if he wanted to keep a clear conscience.

And so he stepped closer until he could take a seat beside the brunet.

“What’s going on? It’s clearly not _nothing_ ,” Fili asked him carefully.

The young man merely shook his head.

“It’s fine. I’m fine. It’s nothing.”

But it wasn’t fine, his voice wavered with fresh tears and his hands fished for another handkerchief. There wasn’t another reply and Fili couldn’t really fault him for not confiding in him, they didn’t know each other after all.

“I’ve seen you quite often in the past,” Fili therefore began to speak, the slight way the brunet bended his head told him he was listening. “At the bus stop, in the canteen, in my favourite coffee shop… we always seemed to have a similar routine. I’m often stressed, because I’m aiming for top grades to impress my uncle, so I have to admit that hearing you bragging and laughing so loudly all the time was pretty annoying. I’m just fed up with college and so seeing you at least two times a week just added to my bad mood, but then you disappeared for two weeks and when you returned you were suddenly quiet and seemed to withdraw from everyone. Yes, I don’t know you, but I’m worried about you.”

This caught the other’s attention. Slowly his eyes met Fili and what he saw in the young man, made the blond swallow with difficulty. A gaze as raw as a wound, underlined by worn out features, turning to him with a tiny spark of trust. He had looked less a mess when he’d tried to hide his emotions. Right now there was only hurt and disbelief. Had he thought no one would care?

“Whatever it is that happened, I promise you, I won’t judge,” Fili added reassuringly.

The blond waited patiently, while the brunet lowered his head once again, hands rubbing over his thighs nervously.  He had already a guess, putting the little bits and pieces together the other had offered with his words, yet restrained himself from uttering it – the last he wanted was for the younger man too lose the courage he seemed to gather.

“I… ah… there… there is this video,” the brunet said at last. He licked his lips tensely, while his fingers began to tug at a protruding piece of skin on his thumb. Fili winced slightly as this action drew a small trickle of blood. “It’s… I… my ex… he… it was his birthday and… I was tipsy and… and I… I just wanted him to have a great night and he… at one point he… he asked if… if…”

“If he could film it?” Fili offered calmly, registering that the student had trouble getting the words out.

The brunet nodded jerkily, shoved his bleeding thumb into his mouth to suck the blood off. It seemed to help for the time being, but he still reached for a handkerchief, once he felt composed enough to continue.

It didn’t shock Fili, sex tapes were by no stretch something rare or weird and just because he would never think of filming such stuff himself, since it felt too private for him, he could see the appeal it might hold for others, after all, he had watched his fair share of porn as well.

“He… uh… he filmed it with his phone… so… it’s… it’s only me and… _parts_ of him,” his cheeks reddened with shame. “And when I… when I broke up with him… he sent it to all of my friends… I mean… at least I thought they were my friends.”

With a jittery movement, the brunet wiped the thin sleeve of his shirt over his eyes and cheeks to dry the fresh tears.

Fili’s heart ached at the thought of what the brunet had been going through during the past weeks. Just one mistake in the past was enough, a decision made not only in a moment of drunken lust, but also out of love and trust. And now no one was standing by him, people called him a slut, perhaps even worse and who knew what else he had to deal with since the video went around. Fili could merely shake his head in disgust and anger.

“Have you gone to the police?”

The younger man turned to him so fast as if Fili had slapped him.

“I can’t go to the police!” he replied urgently. “They… they would… they would watch it… I… can’t… I…” A sob forcing its way out of his throat silenced him, pushing another wave of desperation over him. He hunched over, trembling and crying and Fili felt like he might start to tear up any second as well at the sight.

“Listen,” Fili said in a breathy voice, “you have to go to the police. He can’t just spread this video without your okay. You can’t let him get away with it.”

“And what if he starts sending it to the teachers? What if he will decorate the campus with pictures of it… I’m… I don’t know what to do!”

Fili had no idea how to respond. The work of the police could take ages, not to mention a lawsuit. Was justice worth greater suffering? Fili wanted to say yes, seeing the other student so worn out and at the end of his rope, though, it appeared like giving up would be the kinder choice.

And yet the stubborn side of him didn’t want to accept it. He had no clue of the judicial system, but there where people out there who did and Fili knew even some of them, the benefits of being the heir to a huge company.

“I’m sure there is something we can do, so it won’t come that far,” Fili tried to reassure the younger man.

“We?” the brunet croaked, meeting his gaze with surprise.

Fili nodded.

“I know some lawyers I could call. I’m sure they could give us some advice on how to solve this situation. So how about we get out of here, sit down with a nice cup of tea and try to figure out how to end this nightmare?”

A furrow of confusion had evolved between the brunet’s brows. Fili noted with satisfaction that the tears had ceased.

“You… why would you help me?” he gasped.

The blond shrugged.

“Because your ex and your friends are arseholes and frankly, I don’t like seeing arseholes getting away with such shit. So, tea?”

The other hesitated for a few seconds, eyes wandering between his phone and Fili, but at last he nodded and a tiny, grateful smile flashed over his lips.

Before he could get up and encourage the young man to do the same, his voice stopped him.

“I don’t even know your name.”

Fili smiled. “Finnley. Although I prefer to be called Fili, only my mother calls me Finnley.”

The other stared at him then, blinked once, twice.

“No way,” he breathed in disbelief, causing Fili to frown.

“What’s so strange about it?”

“Nothing! Nothing!” the brunet relented hurriedly. “It’s just… my name is Kilian, but everyone calls me Kili.”

Fili couldn’t keep himself from laughing at the strange coincidence, if that wasn’t all the more reason to help Kili. After all, he couldn’t forsake a name twin, could he?

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapters will provide some little glimpses into the future that will be posted at a later point. Putting them all together in one chapter felt like being unfaithful to the original plot idea.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is one of the three glimpses into their future I wanted to tackle. The main story was supposed to end after chapter one, but there were these three scenes I wanted to do and which wouldn't have fit very well with the rest of the story, had I put all of it in only one chapter. 
> 
> I also added new tags for this chapter, so please proceed with care.

 

 

Kili was laughing loudly at something Nori must’ve said, when Fili returned from the restroom, since he could see his friend snickering. He should’ve known right from the beginning that these two would get along well and he truly enjoyed seeing the brunet so happy. Things were looking good, compared with the day he’d found the other young man crying in the library. Kili had a new phone, so the obscene texts people had sent him were finally in the past and his ex, Drake Smaug, had to deal with a lawsuit for spreading the video.

It was great to see the brunet smile and laugh again. Over the last weeks Fili had realised that while Kili had a healthy amount of self-confidence, he wasn’t a bad guy in general. It had taken the other some time to warm up to his presence, but once he did they seemed to click right away, something Fili hadn’t thought possible just a couple of weeks ago.

But Kili was charming, he was kind, he was funny, enthusiastic and overall a wonderful person. Sure, he could be rash and bold and cocky, no one was perfect, though and therefore Fili had no trouble with overlooking some of the stuff he didn’t like in favour of getting to know the great person beyond it. In return the brunet never complained about Fili’s constant state of annoyance and besides, the blond had to admit that he was a lot more relaxed since they had become friends.

While his other friends didn’t study at the same college, Kili was never far away and stopped him from running himself ragged. He would pull him out of his room, away from his books, just to go for a walk or meet up for a coffee. Studying was easier with the breaks the brunet offered him and which Fili would never grant himself, the younger man’s stubbornness coming in handy pretty often now.

And not only these things had changed. Talking with Kili had turned his life upside down.

Sitting down next to the brunet Fili’s hand came almost automatically to a rest on Kili’s thigh, where the brunet soon intertwined their fingers.

“I can’t believe you’ve kept your boyfriend a secret for that long,” Nori talked against the loud music of the band.

The pub was pretty crowded on days like that. People loved the live music, liked to dance and drink and cheer. The merry mood was the reason why Kili had insisted on dragging them here today, Fili couldn’t say he minded.  The music was alright and his friend and boyfriend seemed to get along well, the evening couldn’t have turned out better.

“Well, I needed to be careful. I couldn’t have you stealing him,” Fili stuck out his tongue before taking a sip of his beer.

And indeed, in the past there had been situations, when Fili and Nori had felt attracted to the very same dude and it had always been the redhead leaving with a fling for the night. Not that it was surprising, Fili wasn’t that good when it came to flirting and therefore was now more than happy that Kili had dared to approach him with those developing feelings between them. Despite what he’d been through, he was a lot braver when it came to the matters of the heart or perhaps Fili had just been such an open book that he hadn’t feared rejection when he asked him out.

“That wouldn’t have worked anyway,” Kili replied, a cheeky gleam lying in his eyes as he smiled widely.

“Oh,” Nori leaned over the table, smirking at the brunet, “and why is that?”

“I have a thing for blonds.”

The soft squeeze at his hand told him that his boyfriend hadn’t only a thing for blonds, but also for honesty, faithfulness and kindness. Fili squeezed back, telling him he understood.

“I could dye my hair,” Nori suggested jestingly, drawing a roaring laugh from Kili’s throat.

“Back off, Nori, or I will snog him until you can’t stand the sight of us anymore,” Fili said merrily.

His friend snorted, but it seemed to do the trick, for the topic changed pretty fast after that. They talked a little about Ori’s studies and enlightened Kili with some ridiculous stories from their youth. The brunet, in turn, had some equally unbelievable tales to offer.

And so the hours went by, with the promise of the night ending pretty much perfect, if there hadn’t suddenly been this guy, just when they wanted to leave.

Fili was just busy with putting on his coat, when a man shoved himself between him and Kili. At first he didn’t think much of it. The pub was pretty crowded and almost every minute someone headed to the restroom or to the bar to order more drinks. It didn’t seem unusual, but then he heard his boyfriend curse.

He felt immediately sober again, once he spotted the hand grabbing Kili’s arse. The younger pushed the man away, a shocked and angry expression wandering to his features as he sneered something that was lost in the volume of the music. The groper wasn’t looking as if he got the message, just leaned closer to Fili’s boyfriend, perhaps saying something to him, before his hand went this time to an area that made Fili and Kili act at the same time.

The brunet’s fist collided with the guy’s cheek in the same moment Fili yanked him backwards, causing the disgusting prick to lose his footing and crash into the table they had just been sitting at.

Kili was gone in a heartbeat, disappearing in the crowd as if he’d never been in the pub with them. It was only due to Nori’s fast reaction, pushing a knee between the bastard’s shoulder blades and thus keeping him on the ground that stopped Fili from kicking the other guy. Around them the music came to a stop all of a sudden, someone screamed to call the police, while loud whispering informed the whole pub about what happened.

Fili felt helpless as the people began to insult the groper on the floor, who thrashed in Nori’s strong grip, claiming he hadn’t done anything wrong. Fili wanted to rip him from Nori’s hold, wanted to shake him, wanted to slap him, wanted to ask him in which kind of world it was okay to touch someone against their will, but he couldn’t become guilty of an offence as well. It wouldn’t help Kili.

Kili… shit. He tried to spot him in the crowd, but only found gaping faces.

“See if you can find him outside,” Nori told him, just when Fili was about to despair. “I’ve got this.”

And while everything inside him just wanted to punch the sick fuck on the ground, he knew that Kili needed him more. Luckily the guests realised where he was heading and allowed him to pass more or less without squeezing through an endless mass of bodies.

Outside the street in front of the pub was empty, save for a couple of people smoking, who obviously had no idea what was going on inside. Fili didn’t have to search long, though and detected the brunet, trembling and out of breath, in a byway close to the pub.

Every little shred of anger Fili had been feeling rushed out of him in mere seconds, leaving nothing but a raw sense of worry.

“Kili?” he called him softly.

The other flinched violently. The expression on his face was hidden by the shadows of darkness, but the blond didn’t need to see his face to feel a pang of rejection, when Kili took a step backwards instead of coming to him.

“Kili, it’s me,” he said as he took a step forward. “Just me.” Another step. “Nori is securing the guy and the police have been called.” One step. Two. “No one else is here.” Almost there. “It’s alright now.”

Although, no. Nothing was alright. Not after what had just happened. It wouldn’t be alright for a long time. But that wasn’t what Kili needed to hear right now, he was frightened enough as it was. He needed positive things to focus on.

The brunet’s hands were nervously rubbing over his thighs, as if he didn’t know what to do with them otherwise. When another shudder went through his body, Fili was finally close enough and he didn’t hesitate.

Reaching for his boyfriend’s hands cautiously, he noticed with relief that Kili wasn’t attempting to back away this time. Instead he allowed Fili to pull him gently against him, until he could offer his boyfriend the hug he was dying to give him. It took the blink of an eye and then Kili was clutching him tightly, shaking in his hold and breath hitching dangerously.

“It’s alright. You are safe now,” Fili whispered soothingly in Kili’s hair.

“He saw the video,” the brunet somehow managed to force out, voice sounding choked and muffled, where Kili hid his face at Fili’s shoulder. “Wanted to have a good fuck.”

Being there for his boyfriend, hugging him close and giving him the comfort he so desperately needed was the only thing that stopped him from turning around and beating that bastard until he couldn’t remember his name anymore.

“Don’t worry, the police will deal with him,” he told him softly, lacking a better reply.

And what could he say, really? This situation was fucked up. There was nothing he could say, nothing he could do. He was just as helpless as Kili.

“The guy is sick, you hear me? Even if you were the kind of person the video made him believe, it still wouldn’t give him the right to touch you without your consent. You haven’t done nothing wrong.”

Kili shuddered again in his arms, causing him to huddle closer against Fili.

And like this they remained, holding each other with the blond whispering reassuring words of love into Kili’s hair, until the police arrived eventually.

 

 


	3. Chapter 3

 

 

Fili smiled into the kiss. Today was a good day. The lawsuit was finally over. Drake Smaug had to delete the video, just like everyone he sent it to. Those people would soon receive a letter by one of Fili’s lawyers and only the list of names Kili’s ex had given them, had saved him from a year in prison. The big compensation he had to pay, couldn’t be avoided, though.  Smaug had underestimated with how much brutality the lawyers of a successful company would proceed and so everything had taken a turn for the better.

After the incident in the pub, Fili hadn’t seen his boyfriend this happy in a very long time. The tension had left his shoulders and he looked much more at ease with himself. He looked so wonderful with the smile on his lips, the blond hadn’t been able to stop himself from kissing him. And here they were now, in his bedroom and making out, with the way Kili’s hand had snuck under Fili’s shirt promising even more.

It was a slow, but tender and hot, the loving pace allowing them to feel the sensations more acutely and building their arousal steadily until they were softly panting into each other’s mouths. Kili’s hand was playing with his chest hair, causing the blond to shiver softly. His boyfriend wasn’t an innocent flower and even though they had never gone as far as feeling the hardness of the other pressing against them, Kili seemed to know exactly what he needed to do to send pleasure through Fili's body.

He willingly broke the kiss by the time the brunet’s finger curled around the hem of Fili’s shirt and began to pull it over his head. The cooler air of the bedroom hit his heated skin, but he couldn’t have cared less, helping his boyfriend to get rid of his shirt as well.

When they started to grind against each other, Kili wasn’t able to continue their sloppy kisses, pulling his bottom lip between his teeth and moaning softly. Fili simply latched onto his neck, sucking marks into his skin and relishing Kili’s sensual panting.

Fili was trying to remember if there were condoms and lube in his bedside cabinet, although he would already be happy enough to get them off with his hand, as long as they wouldn’t have to interrupt their current closeness. With that in mind he let his hands wander over Kili’s body, sliding down slowly until they were stopped by his boyfriend’s jeans. Finding the button and the zip, the blond opened them easily, almost making the fabric spring apart.

He was just about to repeat this action with his own pants, when Kili suddenly tensed at the lack of pressure on his crotch. Halting what he was doing immediately, Fili looked up at his boyfriend. The gleam of arousal had left his features and instead the blond spotted nervousness and even a hint of fear.

“Kili?” he asked him softly, pulling him from whatever thoughts where weighing down on him.

The brunet met his eyes with a look of shame crossing them and Fili understood. Cupping the side of Kili’s head gently with one hand, he began to stroke the other’s cheek with his thumb.

“Hey, it’s alright. There is no camera here, you don’t need to be afraid,” he tried to soothe him.

A tear escaped between his lids, one Fili was quick to wipe away.

“I know,” his boyfriend croaked. “It’s… it’s just…”

“Yeah,” he replied, unable to stop the sad expression from wandering to his features.

It didn’t matter if he or Kili himself claimed nothing bad was going to happen. Over the last months the video had defined Kili’s life in one way or another. So it wasn’t surprising that his subconscious wasn’t allowing him to let go, to give himself to another man. His head was too busy with remembering what had happened the last time, that it didn’t matter that this was a different situation. Time… he was in dire need of more time. But most importantly, he shouldn’t feel ashamed for such needs.

“Whatever you need, Kili. Just tell me. We could go to your place, if we ever try things like that again or to a hotel. It doesn’t matter as long as it helps you to feel comfortable around me.”

“I am comfortable,” his breath was hitching and another tear slipped from his eyes. He was blinking fast now.

“I know,” Fili whispered, pressing a tender kiss to Kili’s wobbling lips. “I know, believe me. This video has fucked up your life. It’s natural that its impact won’t leave you that easily.  But you don’t have to be ashamed, okay? Not with me. I don’t mind waiting until you are ready. I don’t mind waiting for you at all. I love you, Kili.”

His boyfriend nodded sharply, suddenly leaping forward and hugging Fili tightly. He returned the embrace, holding Kili’s shivering form.

In the end it didn’t matter how promising their evening had begun. Fili was just as content with simple closeness as he was with everything else. Having Kili with him was enough and hearing the brunet quietly utter an _i-love-you_ as well, once he was able to calm down a little, was all it needed for his heart to fill with warmth.

They would get through this. Together.

 

 


	4. Chapter 4

 

 

Fili rolled his eyes as he watched Kili flirt with the girl behind the counter. Regardless how much he loved the other, this would never be a side he liked about him.

When he finally returned to their table, Fili huffed with annoyance, accepting the coffee without a word of thanks.

“Awww, Fee. You aren’t jealous, are you?” his boyfriend asked him teasingly, softly nudging him with his foot under the table.

Fili snorted and took a sip of his coffee, trying to ignore the smugness on the other’s features. It only served in burning his tongue on the scalding drink.

“Oh, come on. I’m just trying to be nice.”

“You can be nice without flirting with her, just to get a coffee for free.”

“I don’t do it for the free coffee,” Kili sounded truly surprised.

He didn’t buy it, though and simply rolled his eyes again.

“I mean it. The free coffee is just a bonus. But if I can make their day a little better with treating them like a decent human being, like everyone should, …why not?”

Fili frowned. The seriousness on Kili’s features was something he hadn’t spotted yet, when it came to this topic. That wasn’t the cocky young man the blond sometimes wanted to strangle – in a loving way, mind you – this was a completely new side of him. One he hadn’t expected to see at all.

“You have worked in such a job, haven’t you?” he found himself asking.

To his anew surprise, the brunet shook his head.

“No, but my mum,” Kili confessed. “And being treated kindly by customers could make her day.”

And now it began to make sense. If his boyfriend had experienced her bad mood regularly, he must’ve been thankful for every customer that helped her to return home with a smile. But still…

“Can’t you at least cut back on the flirting?” Fili grumbled.

A mischievous twinkle darted to Kili’s eyes, followed by a grin that could only be described as wicked. His boyfriend leaned over the table, inching closer to him.

“Perhaps I’m lacking some discipline.”

Fili was barely able to muffle the surprised scream as a foot suddenly pressed against his crotch, rubbing over it teasingly until he had to grab the table for support. Unbeknown to him the brunet had managed to slip out of one of his shoes.

“I’m a bad, bad boy,” Kili whispered erotically. “Don’t you think I need to be punished?”

“When we are at home I will-,“ Fili had to bite on the insides of his cheeks to muffle the obscene moan that threated to cross his lips, as a spark of pleasure shot through his body.

“That’s what I wanted to hear,” Kili replied with a pleased smile.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading, leaving kudos and commenting! 
> 
> I hope you enjoyed the story and weren't too disappointed by the glimpses, for as mentioned, the main part of the story was chapter 1 and everything that follwed after just little things I didn't want to leave the story without, but which would have ruined the flow of the first chapter had it all been posted as a one shot.


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